The Historical, Humorous
Math Newspaper

A Math E-book
History, Literature, and Entertaining Instruction, as well as Math.

Published by the SMP Company, PO Box 1563, Santa Fe, NM 87504
Copyright 1999/2000/2001/2002/2003/2004/2005/2006 by Montgomery Phister, Jr.
Return to he Home Page
Our E-book contains
The Complete Gnarly Gnews:
Over 688 pages with Forty-eight Issues of our Newsletter,
Dated from 26172 B.C. to 2145 A.D.!
In Adobe Acrobat Reader (PDF) format,
Completely Indexed.

Here are some of the things you'll experience.
  • Read interviews with Pythagoras, Marco Polo, Shakespeare, Queen Elizabeth I, Lewis Carroll, and many more historical personalities.
  • Learn some mathematical magic
  • Meet an Academy Award winner, an Astronaut, and a Robot designer -- all Engineers
  • See what the Ancient Greeks, Egyptians, Arabs, and Romans knew about mathematics
  • Watch an old Chinese vase detect an earthquake
  • Discover the two infinities -- one larger than the other
  • See how Daedulus built a wing so he and Icarus could fly out of prison
  • Look at the Tabloid Issue of the Gnarly Gnews
  • Meet the first woman mathematician
  • Learn how Aesop Came Up with his Fables
  • Visit Nomath Island, where there are no numbers.
  • Find out about Latitude, Longitude, and the International Date Line
  • Learn something about the Stock Market
  • Time travel to 26172 BC and 2145 AD
  • Study the mathematics of baseball and of navigation
  • Design a toga!
  • Discover what a Perfect Number is
  • Easily add together all the whole numbers from 1 to 100,000
  • See how our CD-ROM Gnarly Math was predicted in Romeo and Juliet and in Alice in Wonderland
  • Find out how to escape a maze.
  • Let Isaac Newton Explain Gravitation to you.
  • Read about Einstein's Relativity, and find out how space warps.
  • Learn how to invent, and about some very young inventors.

Below are chapter dates and places for the first 48 issues of our newsletter, the Gnarly Gnews.
To buy this entertaining and educational E-book, click here.

Table of Contents (Arranged by Date)
(To see a partial Index, click
here.)

26172 BC, Southern Europe

A Trip to the Past
The World's First Genius?


2590 BC, Memphis, Egypt

Zoser's Grand Vizier Improves Hieroglyphics
Circles and Squares


1480 BC, Knossos, Crete

Daedulus Escapes!
Bull-Jumping in Ancient Crete

1342 BC, El-Amarna, Egypt
Ancient Egyptian Ship
Ship Brings Stuff from All Over the World
Sculpture of the Beautiful Queen Nefertiti

815 BC, Carthage

Queen Elissa
Queen Elissa Escaped from Tyre
558 BC, Sardis, Lydia

Famous Lawmaker Visits Sardis
Thales versus Pythagoras

430 BC, Syracuse

Herodotus says Circular Map is Absurd

293 BC, Alexandria, Egypt

Euclid Claims All Triangles are the Same!
"Egyptian Art is Terrible," Greek Visitor Says

210 BC, Xian, China

Chinese Emperor Constructs the Great Wall
A Clay Army for the Emperor's Tomb

1 AD, Rome

Germanicus, the Future Emperor?
A Toga Lesson

64 AD, Alexandria, Egypt

Heron, the Great Inventor and Engineer
Devises Steam Turbines while Rome Burns

256 AD, Tikal, Guatamala

Tikal Trounces Chichen Itza!
Turkeys and Parrots in Maya

403 AD, Alexandria, Egypt

Theon Saw the Tidal Wave!
Hypatia: Mistress of Math

208 AH, Baghdad

Local Man Invents Algebra!
Former Caliph Now in the Thousand and One Nights

1275 AD, Shang-Tu, China
 width=
Giant Earthquake in Karakorum!
Marco Polo finds Kites, wheelbarrows, and parasols in ancient China

1490 AD, London, England
England's first printer

An Interview with England's First Printer
The Mathematics of Perspective

1509 AD, Rome, Italy
The Sistine Chapel

Michelangelo Paints the Ceiling of the Sistine Chapel
DaVinci: Artist Invents the Parachute

1599, London

Local Doctor Says the Earth Goes 'Round the Sun!
Bill Shakespeare's New Play is at the Globe.

1699, London.

Investigation at the Mint
Warden Nabs Counterfeiters
Samuel Pepys: Jack of All Trades

1735, Konigsberg, Russia

Mathematician Teaches Us Russians How to Stroll
"Who ever heard of a Cat with Gloves?" asks Mr. Doubtalot

1855, Cork, Ireland

Boole's Elephant proves 1 + 1 = 1 !!
Carl Gauss Dies!
Mathematician was a Child Genius

1866, Oxford, England

The Shy Professor
How did "Alice in Wonderland" Come to be?

1897, Indianapolis, Indiana

New Value for Pi Simplifies Math!
Russians to be Punched Up, Just like Us!
What will the New Century Bring?

1916, Berlin, Germany

Albert Einstein Amazes the World

1928, Washington, DC
Thomas Alva Edison Henry Ford's quadricycle
Mr. Edison, the Wizard of Menlo Park.
Henry Ford, and a Car for Everyone

1995

Fermat's Last Theorem Proved!
Teenagers Make Mathematical News

1999

Gnarly Math Predicted by Shakespeare and Lewis Carroll!
Voynich Manuscript Puzzles Scholars!

2000.

Unusual Water Wheel Perplexes Owner!
Butterflies Cause Tornados!

2000.

The Bigger Your Shoes, the More Words You Know!
Gambler Discovers Secret of Roulette!

2000.

Paradoxes
This Headline is False!
Can Your Computer Think?

2001

Yellow Havoc is Coming!
You'd Better Believe It: Baseball Loves Math

Year of the Visitors, Nomath Island

Visitors Crashed from the Sky
They'd Never Heard of Nomath Island!

2002

Dallas Cowboys and Math
Journalists are Terrible Mathematicians

2002

Euclid Lives! Found in Australia Shearing Sheep
Mathematician Wrestles Hippos in Kitchen!

2003

Sailing for Beginners
Why Does a Boat Float?

2003

Did you Ever See a Perfect Number?
Abracadabra 22! There's Magic in Math

2004

A Horse in the House?
Horse History: Man's Old Friend

2004, New York City

Uffalo, Inc. Opens Store in China
Talking Toy Saves Girl's Life!

2004 The Engineers' Issue

You Say All Engineers are Geeks?
Check out these Engineers, into Space, Robots, Movies, and More!

2005 The Astronomy Issue

How Many Eclipses Each Year?
How Far the Stars? How Big is Mars?

2005
Engineer with his computer
sysem
Engineer Begins with Radios, Ends with Computers.
All Sorts of Unusual Animals.

2005, The United States
The Oldest Turbine
Turbine Design Today.
A Young Engineer Explains His Job.

2005, Denver, Colorado

Getting Electricity to a Small Town in Ecuador
Latitude, Longitude, and the International Date Line

2006, Costa Pobre
King Richard's Jester Knows Where his Bread is Buttered
A Foolish Postal Policy Delivers Mail Three Days Late

2006, The United States

The Code Breaker Issue
Caesar and Sherlock Holmes

2006, The United States

The Under New Management Issue
Escape via Time Travel
Mr. Riemann and his new Geometry

2006, The United States

The Invention Issue
You, too can be an Inventor
Invent a Better Teacher


2145 AD.

Strange People on Newly-Found Planet!
Hundredth Anniversary of BrainRadios!

Index -- of People, Places, Math, and Everything Else
People
Aegeus, King
Aesop
Akhenaton, Pharaoh
Alberti
Ali Baba
Alexander
    the Great
Alice Liddell
Al-Khwarizmi
Alladin
Antony and Cleopatra
Appolonius
Archimedes,
    and Pi
Archimedes,
    and Levers
Archimedes,
   Books by
Ariadne
Aristarchus
Asimov, Isaac
Augustus Caesar
Bartels, Johann
Bell, Alexander
Berra, Yogi
Boole, George
Brunswick, Duke
Campo, Dave
Cantor, George
Capulet
Brunelleschi
Carroll, Lewis
Carroll, Lewis
   Predicts
    Gnarly Math!
Caxton, William
Cawdrey,
   Robert
Cleopatra
Cleopatra
    and Caesar
Columbus
Copernicus
Croesus, King
Cruz, Jose
Daedulus
Demetrius
Dietrich, Charles
Diophantes
Dodgson, Charles
Drake,
    Sir Francis 1
Drake,
    Sir Francis 2
Dorothy
Duell, Charles
Edison, Thomas
Elvis
Eohippus
Epimenides
Eratosthenes
Euclid
   in Alexandria
Euclid
   Dividing Line
Euclid
   and Perfect
    Numbers
Euclid Lives!
Euler, Leonhard
Ford, Henry
Franklin, Benjamin
Galileo 1
Galileo 2
Gardner, Martin
Gauss, Carl
Germanicus
Gilbert,
    Dr. William
Goldenheim,
    Dave
Gutenberg
Halley, Edmond
Harun ar Rashid
Hayes,
    President
Henry VIII
Hercules
Hollerith,
    Herman
Hypatia
Icarus
Imhotep
Julius Caesar
Juliet
Kelvin, Lord
Kublai Khan
Langley
Litchfield, Dan
Magellan
Marconi
Marco Polo
Mayor
    of London
Mercutio
Minos, King
Mohammed
Nebuchadnezzar
Nefertiti, Queen
Newcomb
Newton, Isaac 1
Newton, Isaac 2
Paige, Satchel
Pappus
Pasteur, Louis
Peano, George
Penn, William
Pepys, Samuel
Pharaoh
Pharaoh,
    2590 BC
Ptolemy 1
Ptolemy 2
Ptolemy,
    Books by
Ptolemy's
    Universe
Pythagoras
Pythagoras
    in Lydia
Queen
    Elizabeth I
Raleigh,
    Sir Walter
Rembrandt
Romeo
Romeo
    and Juliet

Scheherazade
Shakespeare
Shakespeare,
   Interview with
Solon
Sosa, Sammy
Sostratus
Tenniel, John
Thales
Theon
Theseus
Turing, Alan
Tuthmose
Vitruvius
Vizier
Wiles, Andrew
Wren, Christopher
Zeno
Yoda
Zeus
Zhu Shijie
Zoser
Places
Alexandria
Alexandria 2
Amazon River
Athens
Athens, Ancient
Australia
Austria
Babylon's
     Hanging
    Gardens
Babylon
Baghdad,
    208AH
Cambridge
    University 1
Cambridge
    University 2
Caroline College
Chichen Itza
China
    and Chaos
China, Ancient
China today
Colossus
    of Rhodes
Cork, Ireland
Crete, Ancient
Cyprus
Ecuador
Egypt
Egypt, 2590 BC
Egypt, 1342 BC
England
France, Prehistoric
Germany
Globe Theater
Greece
Guatamala
Hanging
    Gardens,
    Babylon
India
Indiana
Italy
Karakorum, China
Knossos, Crete
Konigsberg
Kunkup, Ecuador
Lascaux Cave
London
Lydia
Maya, Ancient
Mecca
Menlo Park
Miletus
New York 1
New York 2
Nile
Nomath Island
Olympia
Ostia
Oxford
    University
Oz
Philadelphia
Rhodes
Rome
Russia,
   Punched
    Cards
Russia
   and Euler
St. Pauls
    Cathedral
St. Petersburg,
   Punched
    Cards
St. Petersburg
   Academy
Sais
Samos
Saqqara
Sardis
Shang-Tu, China
Sicily
Sidon
Smyrna
Tahoe, Lake
Tikal, Guatamala
Texas
Tower of
    London
Venice
Whitehall
Zummara
Math, Science, and Engineering
Acceleration
Airplanes
Algebra, Arabian
Algebra,
    Boolean
Algebra,
    Egyptian
Algebraic
    Equations
Arabic Numerals
Architect
Architect's
    drawings
Area, computing
Area, Egyptian
Area,
    Quadrilateral
Area, Triangles
    and
    Hexagons
Arithmetic,
    Mayan
Arithmetic,
    Nomath
Astrolabe
Astronaut
Astronomy,
    Arabian
Astronomy,
    Newton's
Astronomy,
    Roman
Automobiles
Baseball
    Statistics
Batting Average
Beautiful Math
Benford's Law
Bridge design
Business costs
Calendar,
    Arabian
Calendar,
    Egyptian
Calendar
    Mayan
Chinese Pi
Chaos
Chemistry Lab
Circle, Area of
Circle, Egyptian
   Area
Clocks and
    Longitude
Clocks, Ancient
Comets
Computer
    Design
Computers
    in Use
Computers
    Thinking
Conic sections
Cosine
Counting,
    Nomath
Counting,
   Prehistoric
Decimal
    numbers
Dice
Divisibility Rules
Division, Quick
Earth, Size of,
   Arabia
Earth, Size of
   Nomath
Earth and Sun
Earth, Flat
Eclipse
    and Thales
Eclipses
Electricity
Electricity:
    Ohm's Law
Energy
Equation
    Factoring
Equations,
    Chinese
Equilateral
    triangle
Electrical
    Engineeer
Electric System
Ellipse
Engineers,
    Kinds of
Environmental
    Science
Euclid's
    Numbers
Exponents
Factoring
    Numbers
Factoring
    Numbers 2
Fermat's
   Last Theorem
Floating
Fractions
    and Numbers
Fractions,
    Egyptian
Fuel Efficiency
Gambling
Geometry,
    Arabian
Geometry,
    Euclidean
Geometry,
    Nomath
Geometry,
   Prehistoric
Geometry,
    Thales'
Global Position
    System
Global Warming
Goldbach's
   Conjecture
GPS
Gravity
Gravity, Law of
Guessing,
   Mathematical
Gunpowder,
   Chinese
Hexagons
Heximal
    numbers
Hits per Game
Hyperbola
I.E.E.E.
Infinity
Integers
International
    Date Line
International
    Space
   Satellite
Investigation of
    the Laws
   of Thought
ISS
Inventions,
    Prehistoric
Inventions,
    Roman
Japanese
    Engineer
Karakun Robots
Kinetoscope
LED's
Levers
Latitude
Law of Robots
Light 1
Light 2
Light Bulb 2
Logic
Logic Diagrams
Longitude
Map Coloring
Mars
Math Shortcuts
Mathematics,
    Nomath
Magnetism
Magnets
Mass
Measurements,
   Prehistoric
Medicine,
    Arabian
Medicine,
    Egyptian
Mile
Milky Way
Model T Ford
Motion, Laws of
NASA
Multiplication
Numbers 1
Numbers 2
Number System
Number System,
   Prehistoric
Numbers,
   Prehistoric
Numerals,
    Egyptian
Numerals,
    Greek
Numerals,
    Mayan
Parabola
Parabola
    and Cone
Paradoxes
Patents 1
Patents 2
Perfect
    Numbers
Perfect Squares
Perspective
Phonograph 1
Phonograph 2
Pi
Pi, Egyptian
Pi, Egyptian
    2590 BC
Planets
Planets,
    Ptolemy's
Power 1
Power 2
Prime Numbers
Principia
Prisms
Probability,
    Gambling
Probability,
    Baseball
Probability,
    Egyptian
Probability,
    Football
Poles, Magnetic
Punched Card
Pythagoras'
   Theorem
Pythagoras'
   Theorem 2
Pythagoras'
   Theorem 3
Pythagoras'
   Theorem 4
Quadrilaterals
Radio
RADOT
    Computer
Regular Polygon
Robotics,
    Laws of
Robots,
    Personal
Roman
    Numerals
Royal
    Society
Rudder
Scientists
Seismograph,
   Ancient
Shortcuts, Math
Slugging
   Percentage
Smithsonian
Smithsonian
    Institute
Solar Power
Speed
Speedometer, Roman
Square Roots
Square Root,
    Egyptian
Squares,
    Doubling
Statistics
Statistics,
    Errors in
Submarine
    Exploration
Sum of Numbers
Suns
Surveys
Tacking
Telegraph
Telephone
Telescope
Telstar
Tiller
Tools,
    Prehistoric
Top, Gyroscopic
Tortoise
riangles
Trig
Trig, and sailing
UFO's
Vaccinations
Vote Counter
Water Wheel
    & Chaos
Water Wheel,
    Arabian
Watts
Weather
Weight
Wind Chill Index
Wind Farm
Woman
    Engineer
Year, Days in
Zero, Mayan
Zero, Arabian
Zoescope
Everything Else
1001 Nights
Academy Award
Acrostic
Alice
   in Wonderland
Alice
    in Wonderland
   and Gnarly Math
Alligator
Almanac
Amber
Apprentices
Arabian Nights
Armadillo 1
Armadillo 2
Art,
    Egyptian, 293 BC
Art,
    Egyptian, 1342 BC
As You Like It
Assembly Line
Augean Stables
Babylonians
Baseball
Bible
Bicycle
Birthday
Black Death
Boatbuilding
Books, Ancient
Brain Radios
Buffalo
Buggies
Bull-Jumping
Bulls and Bears
Burglar
Butterflies
Camel
Cards, Playing
Catapults
Cave Paintings
Census
Chariot
Chess, Arabian
Chess, Nomath
Clock
Clothing,
   in Tombs
Clothing,
    Prehistoric
Clove Hitch
Clown
Codes
Coins, Lydian
Coins, Chinese
Compass,
    Chinese
Corgis
Counterfeiters
Covered
    Wagons
Cowpox
Crete,
    Paradoxes
Cro-Magnon
Cryptograms
Cryptography
Dallas Cowboys
Dalmatians
Darabukka
Deer Painting
Denver Broncos
Diamonds
Dictionary,
    Arabian
Dictionary,
    English
Digital Model
Doctor
Dog's Life
Dow-Jones
    average
Drills, Ancient
Droids
Dukes
Earthquakes
Earthquake
    on Cyprus
Elephants
Fables
Fire of London
Fireworks,
    Chinese
Food, in Tombs
Football,
    American
Furlong
Galley
Games,
    Egyptian
Garlic
Geography,
   Arabian
Gerrymander
Giraffe
Glue, Ancient
Golden Age
Goldfish
Goliath Beetle
Guild
Guitar Design
Hair color
Handles
   for Tools
Hanging
   Gardens
Heap
Hegira
Hieroglyphics
Hippocampus
Hippos
Hobson's Choice
Homeschooler
Horses
Horse Latitudes
Horse Painting
House
   of Wisdom
Hummingbird
Hut, Prehistoric
Jewelry,
    in Tombs
Jibe
Journalism
Kitchen
Kite
Knots
Koran
Labyrinth
Language,
    English
Language,
   Prehistoric
License Plates
Life, Game of
Lighthouse
Lion
Loch Ness
    Monster
Lodestone
LucasFilms
Lumieres
Magic
    & Medicine
Magic Tricks
Mammoth
Maps, Ancient
Mastadon
Mazes
Media
Metaphor
Mint, British
Minotaur
Monarch
    Butterfly
Money, Chinese
Money, Lydian
Money, Mayan
Motion Pictures
Movies
Movies
    and Engineers
Museum
Musical
    Instruments
Mythical
   Creatures
Native
   Americans
Newspapers
Newspapers,
   Edison's
Onside Kick
Ostrich
Painting,
   Prehistoric
Pandora's Box
Paper, Arabian
Paper, Chinese
Parasol, Chinese
Parrot
Perdix Phoenix
Poor Richard's
   Almanac
Port Side
Predictions
Printing
Printing, Chinese
Pyramids
Pyramid, First
Python
Qrio
Quadricycle
Rhino Painting
Roulette
Sabre-Tooth
   Tiger
Sails, Ancient
Sailboat
Sailboat Issue
Senat
Seven Bridges
Sheep
Ships, Ancient
Shoes
Sindbad
Slaves
Soccer, Mayan
Sonnet
Sounds &
   Hieroglyphics
Space Alien
Satellites
Spelling
Sphinx
Sports, Roman
Starboard Side
"Star Wars"
Steel, Origin of
Stock Market
Stock Tables
Stone Age
Swords
Tabloids
Taming
   of the Shrew

Tidal Wave
Time stopped
Time Travel
Togas
Tombs
Toy Design
Trade, Roman
Trades
Train
Trojan Horse
Tsunami
Turabbit
Turkey
TV Reporting
Type, Chinese
Type, Printing
Universe
   doubling
Vocabulary
Voynich
   Manuscript
Wealth
Weapons,
   in Tombs
Whales
Wheelbarrow
Wrestling Match
Writing, Mayan
Y2K
Yankees, NY
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